Co-conscious or Co-present?
“Co-conscious” or “co-present”? Talk about anything related to these topics. In our group, “co-conscious” was described as 2 or more parts being present together and knowing it/cooperating. “Co-present” was described as 2 or more parts being present together but not really knowing it or cooperating.
ellis, mostly Said,
March 10, 2008 @ 1:28 pm
i’m often co-present with other parts without being co-conscious. what i mean when i say this is, there are two or more parts active, but we can’t really hear or communicate with each other.
it’s taken some work to realize that this is happening, and it’s taken being self-aware enough inside that we can tell who is out, or at least that we think to think about it.
some of it is that it’s kind of how my system has operated as far back as any of us can remember. i know that parts have memories of just segments of the same event–like, one part will hold the emotional content, one will hold the physical content, one or two will have watched what happened from the outside, one or two will have gotten away inside, but remember the beginning…. so it’s like, we often go through life with several of us acting simultaneously.
it took a while to figure that out. maybe it’s because from around the time i was in middle school, i realized that there are things one can do with one’s brain that no one else seemed interested in doing. like discovering i could think three or four completely unrelated things at the same time. i don’t mean having mixed emotions. i mean, being able to simultaneously run through my times tables, conjugate a french verb, memorize my locker combination, sing a song, think through an essay, and write a story.
the problem with co-presence without co-consciousness for me is that it makes it really hard to actually get anything done. because as soon as the part who is controlling the body stops focusing on it, someone else is right there to do something else. or a part might *think* they are controlling the body, and find it doing something totally different from what they intended to do.
and part of it is realizing that just because i can’t *hear* someone else thinking something, it doesn’t mean they aren’t there. i think a lot of us have to consciously think to think “out loud” so the others can hear us. not always, or, you know, if we’re trying to get someone’s attention. but a lot of the time, it’s hard to remember the reason stuff like this happens is that there are several people trying to do different things at the same time. i’ve described it like trying to go through the world in a three legged race (only usually for me in a six or seven legged race!) without agreeing on where you’re going or how to get there. like, if you couldn’t talk while doing it, or beforehand.
co-consciousness is different for me, and it’s a much more relaxed experience when it works. less like a many-legged race, and more like… i don’t really have words for it. like sharing the body, but being more in harmony with each other, and just talking things through. that’s when we’re able to have the same goals, and the same ideas about how to achieve them. things seem more… seamless, i guess. less jerky and complicated.
but thus far, it’s something that’s only happened kind of instinctively, and only rarely, and we can’t figure out how to make it work on purpose.
Anya Said,
October 25, 2009 @ 10:33 am
I just explained this to my therapist in an email and thought I was crazy and thought she might want to lock my up but she mentioned the the word ‘co-consciousness’ and said we would talk about it Wednesday at our meeting. Of course I had to google it, b/c I feel like I am going insane and you have explained in ‘co-present without co-consciousness’ what I was feeling this morning and what I have felt on many occasions for years.
I don’t really think that I have felt the actual co-consciousness that you have describe above that is relaxing for you yet. Maybe that is b/c this, learning of my ‘inner family’ is all new to me. I just decided to go to therapy this past therapy and I like her a lot but I am still afraid of what the future holds.
I was happy to read you comments and relieved to know that I am not alone. I am not sue what kind of site this is or what I have stepped into but I love what I have read and I thank you.
chariots Said,
October 25, 2009 @ 10:56 am
Hi Anya and welcome to our site! I am one of the group members of New Landscape. SEems to me you have “stepped into” a site where you fit just fine
We are an actual group that meets – and we use this blog to continue talking about the topics that came up at the last meeting. And of course people can comment on any posts they want, not just the most recent ones. You are welcome to post here whether you come to meetings or not – so, welcome!
I’ve experienced this co-presence thing this way: Where others are present – but I’m not aware of who or why – just a sense that others are “there”. And I find myself saying or doing strange things. Or later a part will say that they did this or that, or knew about this or that – and I didn’t think they were present at the time. Then I’ve had co-conscious, where I know it’s a couple/few of us, and I/we know who is present. There’s more awareness.
I guess I see the co-conscious meaning I am also co-present. But being co-present doesn’t necessarily mean I’m co-conscious (aware).
Hm – this is hard for me to articulate! …. probably because I’m just the not-so-aware “host”.