1) DEALING WITH TRIGGERS AT MEETINGS—EXPERIMENTAL CHECK-OUT:
At the July meeting, we discussed what procedures to follow if someone gets triggered by something someone else shared. We didn’t come to a conclusion, but agreed on an experiment, for the August meeting. Accordingly, we devoted the first few minutes of the last half-hour (discussion of group format and structure) to a check-out. Anyone who wished had one minute to speak and say how the sharing affected them.

The consensus (unanimous) was that we did not need to do this check-out in future meetings. While people agreed that things others shared sometimes triggered them, they felt they were able to manage the triggers themselves, and that sometimes it was even a positive thing—it made them aware of issues they had, and when it was their turn to share, they had a chance to talk about how those issues affected them. The group also felt that this is a meeting for people who are fairly well along in their healing process and who can handle triggers themselves in whatever way works best for them.

For the September meeting, we will add one more sharing guideline to the list the moderator reads aloud at the beginning of each meeting. If people are comfortable with this new guideline, it will be incorporated permanently. It is:
18) Though we do not share graphic descriptions of our abuse, some things people share may be triggering to others. If you are triggered, please handle it in whatever way works best for you without interrupting the person who is sharing. Some methods that have been helpful to others are: leaving the room, and/or using your own share time to talk about what the issue means to you.

2) CONTINUITY OF NEW LANDSCAPE:
In the interest of getting New Landscape to a point where it can run without “V” by January 2007, we discussed ways of:
• Enlarging the membership (including phone outreach).
• Cutting down expenses.
• Sharing tasks.

3) PHONE OUTREACH AND TRANSPORTATION OPTIONS:
Some people who responded to the questionnaire said they would come to meetings if they knew someone or had someone to travel with. At the June meeting, we put together phone outreach guidelines, and some members volunteered to make calls to potential new members who wanted to talk to someone before they decided whether to come to a meeting. At the August meeting, we agreed to implement those phone outreach guidelines.

Accordingly, anyone who has never been to a New Landscape meeting and would like to talk to a member who has been to a meeting before deciding whether to come can contact “V” (either through email or snailmail). “V” will then arrange for one of the member volunteers to make the call. (A copy of the phone outreach guidelines are appended to this issue of the Writing Project.)

The discussion of transportation guidelines was tabled for lack of time. (In the near future, we would like to set up something for people who would like to travel with someone to the meeting. The transportation guidelines will cover issues similar to those covered in the phone outreach guidelines.)

4) MODERATOR:
Up to now, “V” has been the moderator. In the interest of getting the group to be able to function without her, we decided on the following:

1) September meeting:
“V” will be there. Before the meeting starts, she will ask whether anyone who has been to a meeting before wants to moderate this meeting. If no one does, she will moderate the meeting herself. (Alternate plan: Anyone who has been to a meeting before and wants to moderate the September meeting can let “V” know by email or snailmail before the meeting.)

2) October, November, December, and January meetings:
Jeanette will be the moderator. “V” will still come early to set up the room, as she usually does.

It is hoped that we can set up a rotating schedule of moderators, with each moderator serving for several months.

5) CUTTING DOWN EXPENSES:
It was suggested that we do what the 12-step programs do. They do not have a monthly mailing. Their only expense is for the room rental. We agreed that this might be good for the future, when the meeting attendance is larger. For now, we will still put out the monthly mailings.

[Note from “V”—not discussed at the meeting: 12-step programs have a website or a phone number, either of which will let you know the location and time of meetings in your area. New Landscape is not part of any larger group, and if we didn’t put out our own mailings or otherwise get the word out ourselves, there would be no way for people to know about our meetings.]

It was suggested that we convert the mailing list to all email, to save money and paper. (This is still in the talking stage, but if anyone who receives these notices via snailmail would like to convert to email now, please let us know.)

6) SHARING TASKS:
Some tasks are already shared.:
There is someone who sends out the email version of the monthly mailing.
There are two people who volunteered to make phone outreach calls to prospective new members.
There is someone who will moderate the meetings from October through January.

Other tasks which “V” still does, and which can be done by other members, are:
• Maintaining the relationship with the YMCA (making sure they have reserved the room; paying the monthly rental).
• Coming early on the day of the meeting to set up (chairs, table, signs for the door).
• Monitoring the e-mail account and the post office box (answering inquiries).
• Maintaining the mailing list (adds, deletes, changes).
• Putting out the monthly mailings (writing, duplicating, stuffing envelopes, mailing).
• Buying supplies (envelopes, labels, etc.).

If anyone would like to help with any of these, please contact us.

7) FINANCES:
We will discuss getting New Landscape financially independent at a future meeting (there was no time at the August meeting). New Landscape incurs expenses for:
• Room rental
• Duplicating and stamps for the monthly mailings
• Stationery (envelopes, mailing labels)
• Post office box rental

8. PHONE OUTREACH TO PROSPECTIVE NEW-MEMBERS
WHO WOULD LIKE TO TALK TO SOMEONE FROM THE GROUP BEFORE COMING TO A MEETING

These procedures and guidelines are intended to foster safety and insure that boundaries are kept.

PROCEDURES:
1) Any New Landscape member who wants to volunteer to talk to a prospective-member will let “V” know (either in person at the meeting, or via e-mail or snail-mail).
2) When someone inquires about New Landscape either through e-mail or snail-mail, inform them of the phone outreach availability and guidelines.
3) When a prospective-member indicates that he/she would like to be called, “V” will inform one of the member-volunteers. She will also let the prospective-member know (via e-mail or snail-mail) the name of the person who will call.
4) The member-volunteer will inform “V” when the call has been made. (Also inform her if the call has not been made, so she can find another volunteer or get back to the prospective-member to say no one is available at this time.)

GUIDELINES:
1) Only first names will be used (no last names).
2) The prospective-member will provide New Landscape with his/her phone number, and indicate several times that are good to call.
3) In the interest of privacy/safety, the member-volunteer making the call will not provide his/her phone number to the prospective-member and may turn off caller-ID.
4) The phone call may last up to 15 minutes (no longer).
5) What may be discussed: a) Meeting location; how to get there; b) What happens at meetings: procedures, safety, discussion topics, sharing guidelines, etc.
6) What may not be discussed: a) Personal information about anyone who comes to meetings, e.g., names. b) Anything specific shared at meetings. c) Any issues/problems not pertaining to the meeting (details of personal problems or trauma, etc.).

E-mail: newlandscape1@yahoo.com. Snail-mail: P.O. Box 231315, New York, NY 10023

1) PHONE OUTREACH AND TRANSPORTATION OPTIONS:
There were two items on the agenda: Guidelines for phone outreach to prospective members, and transportation guidelines for people wanting to travel to meetings together. Both of these were outgrowths of the questionnaire, in which some people said they would come to meetings if they knew someone or had someone to travel with. At the June meeting, we agreed on the phone outreach guidelines, and the July meeting was going to be devoted to a discussion of the transportation guidelines. But some of the people who were at the June meeting weren’t at the July meeting, and vice versa. There was disagreement at the July meeting on whether we should have phone or transportation outreach at all. Some people felt we should just focus on the people who were at the meeting, and not concern ourselves with how people get there. Other people felt it was important to provide support to people wanting to come to the meetings. We decided to table both issues for the present, as the more pressing issue of triggers at meetings came up.

2) TRIGGERS AT MEETINGS:
There was a discussion of what procedures should be followed if someone gets triggered by something someone else shared. This item was not on the agenda, but came up in the meeting. The discussion revolved around things that might be triggers to one person, but not another, e.g., mentioning the word “birds,” or the color “blue.” One opinion was to have some sort of signal, like a movement of the foot, to alert whoever is sharing to stop. Another opinion was to do nothing, and let the person who is sharing continue to share, because that is what he/she came to the meeting for; the person who is triggered has the option of walking out of the room during the meeting, or staying and dealing with it in whatever way they do in their particular system. We agreed on a trial procedure for August’s meeting. We will have the regular sharing portion from 10:00-11:30, the way we always have, i.e., no one will be signaled to stop sharing because someone else has been triggered (anyone who is triggered has the option of leaving the room). We will devote the first 10 minutes of the second half of the meeting (discussion of the group format and structure from 11:30-12:00) to a check-out; anyone who was triggered or otherwise upset by anything in the sharing portion of the meeting will have a chance to say so. At some point, we will re-visit the sharing guidelines.

3) CONTINUITY OF NEW LANDSCAPE:
Updated moderator-folders were available; they contain sharing guidelines, signs for the door, etc. Several members took them. Those members can run the meeting if, for some unforeseen reason, “V” isn’t there by 10:00. Eventually, we would like to set up an organizational structure so the group can function without “V”. Some of the tasks involved are: monthly mailings, monitoring the e-mail account, liaison with the YMCA, setting up the room before the meeting, finances, etc. This issue was tabled for lack of time.
* * *

The Future of New Landscape
by V
As most of you know, I started New Landscape in 2004 because I had looked around for a support group and didn’t find any. New Landscape has now been meeting monthly since November 2004. While the meetings themselves are successful and run smoothly—members come because they, too, feel a need to share their experiences in a safe, non-judgmental environment—the group is not yet on its feet administratively and financially.

ADMINISTRATIVE
The administration of New Landscape involves:
• Maintaining the relationship with the YMCA (making sure they have reserved the room; paying the monthly rental)
• Coming early on the day of the meeting to set up (chairs, table, signs for the door)
• Moderating the meeting
• Monitoring the e-mail account and the post office box (answering inquiries)
• Maintaining the mailing list
• Putting out the monthly mailings (writing, duplicating, stuffing envelopes, mailing/e-mailing)
• Buying supplies (envelopes, labels, etc.)

For the 21 months that New Landscape has been in existence, I have done most of these jobs. Because of some recent changes in my life, although I will still be able to attend most meetings, I won’t be able to attend all of them. And while I can still do some of the administrative work, I would like to distribute some of it.

FINANCIAL
New Landscape’s expenses include:
• Room rental
• Duplicating and stamps for the monthly mailings
• Stationery (envelopes, mailing labels)
• Post office box rental

There is no fee for attending meetings. We do pass around a donation bag, but no one has to contribute. The moderator prefaces passing the bag with “We have no dues or fees, but we do have expenses. Please give what you can. And if you can’t give, please keep coming back. We need you more than we need your money.” We usually collect about a quarter of our expenses.

When the group began, I said I would be able to support it financially for six months, until it got on its feet. After six months, it still wasn’t self-supporting, so I continued to finance it. But I can’t do that indefinitely. Because the group is important to me and I want it to continue, I will support it through January 2007. In the meantime, I will work with the members in exploring financial options.

INCREASING MEMBERSHIP
At present, there are about 15 people who have attended New Landscape meetings, but not everyone comes to every meeting; we average 5-6 people at a meeting. I feel strongly that any administrative or financial solution has to involve increasing our active membership (the people who actually come to meetings). To that end, we sent out a questionnaire to everyone on the mailing list (180 people, including therapists). We also produced a pamphlet which gives an overview of New Landscape; we encourage its distribution to therapists and clinics. And we listed New Landscape with the Sidran Foundation and Many Voices/Multiple Choices. The article in the April 2006 issue of Many Voices (separate from the listing) brought us some new members. New Landscape doesn’t advertise on the Internet or in general publications because we don’t want to attract voyeurs.

During discussions about increasing the active membership, some members worried that having more people at meetings would mean less share-time for each person. While that may be true, I think if we had 10 or 12 people at each meeting, each person would still get share time. As not everyone comes every month, that would mean about 20 or 25 active members. Eventually, when the group is on its feet administratively and financially, we won’t need to devote the last half hour to nuts-and-bolts, and that can be added to sharing time. (At present, we meet for two hours. If the group got larger, that could be re-visited.)

FIRST STEP: CHANGING THE MODERATOR
Early on, I asked whether anyone else wanted to be the moderator; I hadn’t envisioned this as a permanent role. But people said they were comfortable with me and wanted to keep it that way. The one month I knew in advance I wouldn’t be there, another member agreed to be the moderator; that worked fine. And there are several members who have taken one of the meeting kits that are on the give-away table so they can moderate the meeting in the event that I have an emergency and don’t show up (to date, that has never happened). The kits contain things like signs for the door, a copy of the sharing guidelines, which the moderator reads aloud at the beginning of each meeting, and a donation bag.

I would like to see the role of moderator rotated, perhaps in 4-month or 6-month terms. This will be on the agenda for the August meeting.

NEXT STEPS
Ideally, there would be a committee to run New Landscape. The danger of having only one person do it is that if that person isn’t there, the group falls apart. But even before we organize a committee, we can distribute some of the other tasks; some members may not want to be on a committee, but would like to help in other ways. (One member now sends out the monthly mailing to all those on the e-mail list; that alone is very helpful.)

SUGGESTIONS WELCOME

1) Questionnaire:
More therapists than “clients” responded to the questionnaire. Most of the therapists said they would recommend (or had recommended) New Landscape to appropriate clients. A few wanted to know more about the group first. The other responses were from people who dissociate. The majority of people who have attended the meetings felt they were beneficial; a few did not. Of the people who haven’t attended, some didn’t know anyone and/or didn’t know how to get there and/or were uncomfortable traveling alone. Others were concerned with issues like safety and confidentiality. Several people seemed to confuse New Landscape with the old NYSSMP&D (New York Society for the Study of Multiple Personality & Dissociation), which used to meet on 120th Street. Just to clarify, when New Landscape was starting (2004), we used the mailing list of the NYSSMP&D, but that is the extent of the connection. New Landscape is not affiliated with any group.

NOTE that it is not too late to send in the questionnaire. The more feedback we have, the more responsive we can be.

2) Phone Outreach:
As a result of the questionnaire responses, we revisited the idea of phone outreach. We decided to start small: just provide phone outreach to people who are considering coming to meetings but would like to talk to someone beforehand. In the interest of safety, we agreed on the following procedures and guidelines.

PROCEDURES:
a)When someone inquires about New Landscape (via email or snail-mail), inform them of the phone outreach availability and guidelines. (We will also include notice of phone outreach in the monthly mailing.)
b)Any New Landscape member who wants to volunteer to talk to a prospective-member will let “V” know.
c) When a prospective-member indicates that he/she would like to be called, “V” will inform one of the member-volunteers. She will also let the prospective-member know (via e-mail or snail-mail) the name of the person who will call.
d)The member-volunteer will inform “V” when the call has been made. (Also inform her if the call has not been made, so she can find another volunteer or get back to the prospective-member to say no one is available at this time.)

GUIDELINES:
a) Only first names will be used (no last names).
b) The prospective member will provide New Landscape with his/her phone number, and indicate several times that are good to call.
c)In the interest of privacy/safety, the person making the call will not provide his/her phone number, and may turn off caller-ID. Only first names will be used (no last names).
d) The phone call may last up to 15 minutes (no longer).
e) What can be discussed: a) Meeting location; how to get there. b) What happens at meetings: procedures, safety, topics, guidelines, etc.
f) What cannot be discussed: a) Personal information about anyone who comes to meetings, e.g., names. b) Any issues/problems not pertaining to the meeting (details of personal trauma, etc.).
Several members volunteered to make the calls, so after we finalize the procedures at the July meeting, phone outreach can begin.

3) Transportation:
Also as a result of the questionnaire responses, some members volunteered take public transportation with other members, or to drive them. We decided to put together transportation guidelines at the July meeting. Some issues to be addressed are: sharing the cost of gas, pick-up and drop-off locations (rather than door-to-door), acceptable topics of conversation.

4) Continuity of New Landscape:
“V” would like to set up procedures so the group can run even if she’s not there. Several members volunteered to be alternate moderators. “V” will update the moderator-folders and have them at the July meeting for anyone who wants one. They contain meeting guidelines, signs for the door, etc. At a future meeting, we will discuss sharing some of the other tasks: monthly mailings, monitoring the email account, setting up the room before the meeting, etc.

Membership/Questionnaire: We agreed to send out a questionnaire to everyone on the mailing list (180 people), and we agreed on the questions. We discussed whether to send the questionnaire out now (before the summer), or in September. The consensus was that we should send it out now.
***

NEW LANDSCAPE
Peer-Led Support Group for Men & Women Healing from DID/MPD or Another Dissociative Disorder

QUESTIONNAIRE
New Landscape has now been meeting monthly since November 2004. Our mailing list of 180 people is composed of:
• People who dissociate
• Therapists (both those who dissociate and those who don’t)
Everyone on the mailing list receives the monthly mailings, but only 4-6 people attend our monthly meetings (there are about 12 people who have come to meetings at one time or another, but not everyone comes every month).

We are circulating this questionnaire in an effort to understand what people’s needs are. It was put together as a group effort by the people who attend the meetings. We hope you will answer as many of the questions as you feel comfortable with and return it to us in the enclosed envelope. (If you have received this questionnaire via e-mail, please answer with either e-mail or by snail-mail.) You do not have to put your name on it, but you may if you wish to.

Thank you.

Please circle one or more choices under each question. Feel free to write comments on anything, even if they don’t pertain to one of the questions. Please attach another piece of paper if you need more room.

1) I have attended at least one meeting and:
a) Found the group helpful
b) Didn’t find the group helpful
c) Felt Safe
d) Didn’t feel safe
e) Other _____________________________________
Comments:

2) I don’t attend meetings because (please elaborate if you can):
a) Not qualified (not dissociative)
b) Location
c) Time inconvenient
d) Don’t know anyone
e) Safety
f) Meeting format
g) Sharing guidelines
h) Fear
i) Focus of meeting (not for “beginners”)
j) Privacy
k) Feel uncomfortable because there is no therapist there
l) Boundaries
m) Prefer to remain anonymous
n) Other _____________________________________
Comments:

3) Monthly mailings:
a) Find them helpful
b) Find them upsetting
c) Neutral
d) Would rather not get them
e) Other _____________________________________
Comments:

4) I come to meetings and/or I have come to meetings in the past.
a) What I like about them:___________________________________________
______________________________________________________________
b) What I don’t like about them: ______________________________________
______________________________________________________________
Comments:

5) I would come to meetings if:
______________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________

6) Any other comments (please attach another piece of paper if you need more room):

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Mailing list:
Monthly mailings go out in two ways: snail-mail and e-mail. Some people get both. Please contact us if:
1) You would like to change the way you receive the mailing (snail-mail, e-mail, both).
2) You know of someone who should be added to our mailing list.
3) You would like to be removed from our mailing list.
4) You want to remain on our mailing list but your address has changed.