3 thoughts on “Sadness

  1. jigsaw analogy--no name

    maybe its easier for me to feel sad than other feelings. probably for me its easier to feel sad than angry. its scary to get angry because its dangerous. i can kind of hide if im sad, and as long as i didnt cry it was mostly ok to be sad… well, not so much ok, but it was less likely to get me hurt. but angry… that was really dangerous and usually that would get me more punished than other feelings.

    but maybe my problem with depression is from shutting off too many feelings. i dont know.

    lots of parts cry in therapy and thats definitely a feeling that is more ok to have nowadays. w and my therapist usually say things like its ok to cry, or they are even proud of me if i cry and show i am sad, so that isnt such a bad feeling to show. but the anger and stuff like that, that causes more trouble so i mostly dont do it even now.

  2. fragmentized

    I think that sadness is something that I enjoy controlling in some ways. Almost like it’s a tiny victory if I can avoid crying.

    Like when I talk about certain things with my therapist, he asks questions to try to see how I feel about things, and I can feel the sadness inside, but I’ll sort of compartmentalize it and ignore it and just talk about what I feel in emotionless terms.

    When I do let it out, my therapist says that I seem more like a “full” person. Which is kinda funny because it’s really just a switch that I can turn on or off. Even if I’m not showing it, I’m feeling it. And it’s really not the outer display of the emotions that matters.

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